Apple hype

The standard online retailer guide to updating an online store:

  1. Upload products quietly, in the background, without fuss. Maybe if the product is particularly exciting, add it to the front page.

The Apple method of updating its online store:

  1. Accidentally leak a minor product shot by accidentally uploading it a few weeks before release. Accidentally. Really.
  2. Wait for hundreds of Apple rumour websites to get terribly excited about a tiny incremental update to a nothing product.
  3. Watch as frenzied Apple fans argue about what other updates are on the way, such as a $5 solar-powered iPhone that also makes perfect toast and tea via WiFi.
  4. Abruptly take down your entire international online store, making it impossible for anyone to buy anything. Add an obnoxious post-it note for good measure.
  5. Wait as Apple fans drive themselves into an apoplectic frenzy, trying to figure out what exciting new things are going to be added imminently.
  6. Watch as Apple news sites report that you took your store down, which means exciting things.
  7. Sit back and laugh heartily, safe in the knowledge that even though the updates are tiny, you’ve just got more marketing than most companies get for a new product launch.
  8. Put the site back online, with as many ‘new’ badges as possible.
  9. Wait for the internet to recover from millions of Apple users refreshing the Apple store fifteen times per second.
  10. Wait for orders to flood in from Apple users starved of the store for a full 90 minutes.
  11. Lather, rinse, repeat.