iOS 7 has a new interface, including new icons. Most make sense, but it’s hard to understand what Game Center’s represents until you know the reasoning behind its design, captured in this EXCLUSIVE transcription of audio taken from a microphone hidden in Jony Ive’s white room of despair.

Game Center icon
  • Ive: Hey, team. So we’ve got another icon to design, for an app called Game Center.
  • Team member A: What’s that?
  • Team member B: I’ve never heard of it.
  • Ive: Me neither. But I checked Wikipedia and it’s been on iOS for years, and so we have to design something for it.
  • Team member C: Um, I’ve a question.
  • Ive: Sure—go ahead.
  • Team member C: Uh, this might sound silly, but… what’s a game?
  • Team member A: That’s a good point. I’ve no idea.
  • Ive: We need to research what these ‘game’ things are. I know all about ‘center’, but ‘game’ is new to me. It’s very exciting.
  • Team member A: You don’t look excited.
  • Ive: I always look like this. You know I only have one expression.
  • Team member A: Sorry.
  • Ive: That’s OK. *mournfuleyes*
  • Team member B: Hey, wait a minute. I remember playing a game with my niece, during my annual hour off from Apple.
  • Ive: That’s great—what did you do?
  • Team member B: She had this liquid and she used it to blow bubbles. She had lots of fun—almost as much fun as we do when we lovingly paw at an iPhone or iPad.
  • Ive: Wow. That does sound like fun. So, games are bubbles. Got it. Get to work, team!