Oh, David Goldman of CNN Money, haven’t you been listening? The iPad is actually doing quite well, grabbing 93 per cent of the market. While it’d be nice if the iPad 2 was unicorn-powered, all Apple really needs to do today is provide a nice upgrade that shoves in a bit of extra clout and some cameras. That alone will see the iPad 2 fly off the shelves, right?

GOLDMAN SAYS NO. In fact, Goldman says some very odd things:

The good and the bad news for Apple is that the year-old iPad still rates highly among even its newest rivals.

That’s good news, because Apple should again have the best-in-its-class tablet if the iPad 2 is as improved as the rumors say it will be.

But that’s also bad news: How much thinner, lighter, faster, better — and perhaps most importantly, cheaper — can the iPad get? Did Apple shoot itself in the foot by making its first generation tablet too good?

Yes, because the one thing people thought when they got an iPad was “man, if only this product was worse”. And iPad-owners thinking about an iPad 2 today are all complaining: “I would have upgraded, if only Apple had made the original iPad complete shit”.

The only people wishing Apple had made the original iPad worse are important figures working for Apple’s rivals.

But, luckily, there’s one way Apple can win this game, thinks Goldman:

Tim Cook, Phil Schiller or whichever Apple executive introduces the iPad 2 will need to offer some impressive specs, lest Apple fans walk away disappointed.

After all, it’s not like the competition tries to differentiate itself by wanking itself into a frenzy over spec lists, rather than, say, what you can actually do with your device. here’s hoping Goldman realises that, eh?

Rival tablets have front- and rear-facing cameras,

Phew!

[…] dual-core processors, four times as much RAM as the iPad, HDMI output and Adobe Flash support.

Oh.

And:

If that’s all Apple does, its fans will probably be unimpressed. Apple may need to have something “magical” up its sleeve, as Jobs likes to say, to wow its potential customers.

NO UNICORN? I’M LEAVING!

To be fair to Goldman (it’s sunny, so I’m in a good mood), he’s right on that last thing. Apple ‘fans’ typically have insane expectations, driven by the rumour mill. However, Apple doesn’t need a checklist of specs that somehow ‘better’ its rivals on paper—it simply needs to stay ahead where things really matter: usability, apps, quality.