From The Metro:

Baroness Greenfield is concerned about the banality of Twitter

Baroness Greenfield doesn’t understand Twitter.

Baroness Greenfield, a professor of pharmacology, fears [social networks] may be having a negative impact on users.

It’s true. Those damned social networks, which keep you in touch with people and enable you to share ideas and communicate. THEY ARE EVIL.

She claimed that a focus on developing internet friendships and the constant feedback they involve had the potential to ‘rewire’ the brain, making people expect instant gratification and reducing their ability to concentrate for prolonged periods of time.

Ooh! Look at that cute LOLcat!

Sorry, what?

Baroness Greenfield suggested the ‘banality’ of the information exchanged on Twitter could become a problem.

The banality in my Twitter feed today being arguments about the US debt ceiling, tons of comments on design, responses to Daily Mail/Liz Jones idiocy regarding the NHS, and articles arguing about the pros and cons of activism.

In other news, the banality of information exchanged by professionals (say, professors of pharmacology), TV pundits and people in pubs “could become a problem”, but it all depends on who you’re conversing with.

The academic said: ‘Why should someone be interested in what someone else had for breakfast?

Why should we be interested in the views of someone who’s clearly never used Twitter, but nonetheless feels compelled to churn out the same old ill-informed arguments about the service?

It reminds me of a small child (saying): “Look at me Mummy, I’m doing this, look at me Mummy, I’m doing that”.

Unlike, say, a professor of pharmacology doing an interview for a newspaper and parroting the same old garbage we’ve heard a thousand times before?

‘It’s almost as if they’re in some kind of identity crisis.

It’s almost as if they’re keeping in touch with people and letting them know what’s going on in their lives, from the banal to the extremely exciting and interesting. Not everyone juggles sharks for a living, every second of the day, Baroness Greenfield. And not everyone can be a professor of pharmacology with a poor understanding of Twitter.

In a sense it’s keeping the brain in a sort of time warp.

MY BRAIN IS DOING PELVIC THRUSTS ON TWITTER! PLEASE SEND HELP, BARONESS GREENFIELD!